Protesting on Behalf of the Gosselin Children

UPDATE: For more info on boycotting Kate Plus 8 go to facebook account. "4-8 Please boycott Kate plus 8 on TLC" It can be found under groups.

* * * * * *below is today's original post * * * * * *

As some of you already know there might be a peaceful protest of TLC filming the Gosselin children in front of the Gosselin property in Wernersville on Saturday, May 28 at 12 PM.

This wouldn't be the first protest against the Gosselin children being exploited in entertainment, and so far the attempts at protests haven't made much of a dent. A year ago in May 2009 Kate Gosselin’s sister-in-law Julie exposed the unreality of ‘Jon & Kate Plus 8 and urged viewers not to watch. In August 2009 a man protested the show by standing outside the Gosselin home with a sign that read, "It's not Jon, It's not Kate, the only losers are the 8."

I'm torn on this one. Like many of you, I am dismayed at the prospect of further filming of the eight, and I was horrified to read that they will be away from home this summer, filming one of their mother's two new shows. I am all in favor of social activism, which has a long history of being an assertive, not aggressive or illegal, way to inform and protest, but I feel so badly for the children, especially Colin at this time, that I can't condone anything that might create more havoc at the house. Therefore, while I support the rights and motivations of anyone who decides to protest in front of the house, I will not be joining them.

I'd like to promote protesting in a way that could not potentially further damage the children. Betty White just hosted Saturday Night Live after a very effective petition was started on Facebook. A facebook petition is something I'd be happy to sign and promote here. I'd also be supportive of a protest at the TLC offices. But not in front of the house where the kids could either see it live or see pictures of it later on. I just think they've been through way too much already.

Meanwhile I'll keep protesting in my own quiet way, by not watching any shows with the Gosselin children in them and by continuing to provide education right here at my Small Town Gosselins blog.

Gloria Allred on PA Child labor Laws

Following is an excerpt of Gloria Allred's testimony at the April 14, 2010 hearing on child labor laws hosted by Pennsylvania Rep. Murt. Although the hearings were not about the Gosselins in particular, they would no doubt have not taken place if the Gosselin children being filmed here had not brought attention to the topic. Therefore, the Gosselins various shows being filmed in PA has provided us with a valuable opportunity to examine and improve our laws regarding children being filmed in entertainment here.

As I read through this first portion of Gloria's testimony I thought of some examples where, throughout this entire "reality" TV experience, the Gosselin's children's needs have not been treated as a priority. Rather than state my observations now, I invite my readers to consider the Gosselin children as they read the statement below, and then comment on how you observe this relating to the Gosselins. Then I'll post another entry listing some of your observations and including my own.

* * * * * *

Good Morning. I’m attorney Gloria Allred, partner in the law firm of Allred, Laughlin, Goldberg in Los Angeles where I’ve been practicing law for almost 35 years. But most of all, I’m proud to be born in Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, graduate of Philadelphia High School for girls, a graduate of the University of Pennsylvania where I was given the honor of being a commencement speaker at the College of Arts and Sciences graduation on Franklin Field just a few years ago. And, also, I was a credentialed teacher at Benjamin Franklin School here in Philadelphia and some other schools as well in Philadelphia before I moved to California some years ago. So, thank you very much for holding this important hearing. Most of all, thank you to Representative Murt and to the other representatives who spent time here today listening very carefully. I’ve testified at numerous hearings on numerous subjects for many years and I have to say I’ve never seen elected officials so attentive and very thoughtful about the testimony that was being presented to them and really obviously looking for ways to resolve the important issues facing the children in Pennsylvania. So I thank you for that.

These children on reality shows don’t have a voice, they don’t make contributions to political campaigns, they don’t run for elective office and s they have no political clout. So ordinarily they got nothing but lip service , if that, from elected officials. But, obviously you are elected officials who want action and who want deeds not just words, and for that I’m very appreciative. What I’d like to talk about today is to give a short overview of what federal law does or does not do in this area, and also to, perhaps, give some analysis of Representative Murt’s proposals that I know he has not distributed, but we’ve had a chance to look at some of them and analyze them, and I’d like to emphasize what I think is positive about them and what perhaps could be a little bit clarified or improved. And then finally, I’d like to make some comments about the investigative process, and not specifically what’s going on with Jon and Kate, but the investigative process in terms of the law. I’ll give you an example, from California, in reference to an investigation that took place on the Nadya Suleman and her eight, well actually fourteen children that she has and whether that process worked or not in reference to what would work here in Pennsylvania.* And I do want to commend Jodi and Kevin Kreider who just gave incredible testimony , just perfect, and Paul Petersen who is in the interest of full disclosure of my client, but who is absolutely the leader above all else on this issue in this nation and for that matter around the world.

To begin, federally, and this background is also provided by and has been provided to me by the American Federation of Television and Radio Artists, I am a member of AFTRA and I’m also a member of SAG. In reference to what the issue is federally, the most pleasing federal law that regulates the employment conditions and prevents the abuse of child workers issues is the Fair Labor Standards Act, FLSA, child labor provisions under FLSA are designed to protect the educational opportunities abuse and prohibit their employment and jobs that are detrimental to their health and safety. The FLSA restricts the hours that youth under 16 years of age are allowed to work and with hazardous occupations too dangerous for young workers to perform. And here’s what’s most important: Children employed as actors or performers in motion pictures, theatrical productions, or on radio or television programs are specifically exempt from Fair Labor Standards Act coverage and the standards and protections provided under FLSA. So let’s talk now about how does the lack of coverage under the FLSA impact children. Without national coverage, children have no consistent protection. Though some states regulate the employment of minors in the entertainment industry, other states have no provisions regulating child labor in this industry whatsoever. Among the states that normally regulate the performances of children in the media industry, few have comprehensive protections for the education health , safety and financial security of children.

For years, children have necessarily been a part of the entertainment industry. It would be impossible to produce the Harry Potter films or television programs like Hanna Montana or the Suite Life of Zach and Cody without employing children as actors. And the proliferation of the so called reality programming has exacerbated the problem by utilizing children on television without any compensation or any other protection either as contestants or subjects of documentary style shows. Without the protections afforded under the FLSA, the welfare of children is put at risk. The recent hoax of the so-called balloon boy, reports that the Octomom was developing a reality TV show and the proliferation of shows like Kid Nation, Jon and Kate Plus 8, or just Kate Plus 8 illustrates that children are increasingly exploited in the media and often without fundamental protection. Federal child labor standards in the entertainment industry would ensure that the well-being of children is not bothered for the proverbial fifteen minutes of fame. As film and television production becomes decentralized, more children than ever are left without protection. States with major entertainment industry production centers like California and New York do have well developed laws and regulations as Paul Petersen had said, governing the performance of minors in the industry. But production is increasingly decentralized particularly if more states like Pennsylvania pass production incentive legislation, that’s tax incentive legislation, designed to lure film and television production to their state. Though union contracts in the industry contain provisions designed to provide the unique protections that children require, many programs are not produced under a union contract. Additionally, the performances of some children like contestants and participants in reality television may not be covered by a union contract because the children are not technically “employed”.

So what protections are needed? First of all in the area of wages. There is currently no minimum wage for children who appear on air. Children who appear in competition or documentary-styled reality programs may not receive any compensation at all. This is nationally.

Financial protections. There are only four states that have a Coogan law requiring establishment of a trust account to preserve and safeguard a portion of their earnings for adulthood.

Health, safety, and working conditions. Children need health and safety protection that is specific to their physical, mental, emotional and developmental needs.

Education. States like California require that teachers be provided for children while they are working on production. California also requires the presence of a parent or a guardian while a child performer works. Other states may have no provisions at all for onset education.

Hours of work. Children need additional rest when working, particularly if they are traveling or working at night. Associate regulation of hourly support is necessary.

Moral oversights. Children should not be placed in a moral situation that is inappropriate, be exposed to distressing scenes, be forced to become distressed in order to prompt a particular reaction or employed in any situation involving nudity, which goes to your concerns, Representative.

Representative Murt, I know, has drafted some proposed improvements or changes in Pennsylvania Child Labor Law and without going through all of them because I think that’s in the province of Representative Murt to present, I would like to comment that I think it’s very positive that he wants to define work in reality shows. His proposals for legislation will require that children who appear on reality television are working as performers and should be subject to the state’s (??) process for child performers.

Minimum wage recommendation by Representative Murt: The legislation which he proposes will recognize that children in reality television should be paid for their performances, or their participation, and that the work load and restrictions in place for children working in other types of television programming such as scripted entertainment programming should be in place for kids in reality television. I see that as a positive as well.

Moral oversight. Representative Murt’s proposed legislation has some provisions related to moral oversight. Meaning prohibitions on photographing children while changing clothes, or bathing, performances where alcohol is present. Additional protections would be helpful. I’ll make a few specific suggestions there.

Health and safety. Representative Murt is concerned with that. His legislation contains provisions related to health and safety, which are good. States should study to see whether (?) protection are necessary.

Now here are some areas that I believe could perhaps benefit from some clarification, Representative Murt, for improvement.

Age of children. The permitting process in Pennsylvania is such that appears that children under the age of seven are not permitted to work. If this is the case, the same restriction should exist for children in reality shows. It would eliminate ambiguity if the legislation were to contain a clearly-worded prohibition against the employment of children under the age of seven in reality shows.

Hours of work. They provide, in Representative Murt’s legislation, that children shall not work before five a.m. or after 11:30 p.m. It strikes me that that’s rather early and extremely late particularly for children as young as seven years of age. Similarly, permitting up to forty four hours of work per week as a proposed legislation and draft suggests, seems to be quite a lot, and I would lessen that.

Financial protection. Only four states, as I have mentioned, have a Coogan Law requiring establishment of a trust account to preserve and safeguard a portion of the children’s earnings for adulthood. Pennsylvania is not one of those states.

Education. States like California require that teachers be provided while they are working on production. By the way, the purpose of the teacher is merely to safeguard the workplace so the children are not endangered. California also requires the presence of a parent or guardian while a child performer works. It’s good that Representative Murt is asking the department to ensure that adequate educational instruction is provided. But the standards they have to meet needs to be defined in my opinion.

Moral oversight in Representative Murt’s proposed legislation. Children should not be placed in a moral situation that is inappropriate, be exposed to distressing scenes, be forced to become distressed in order to prompt a particular reaction. There’s a real risk that these sorts of things can be problems during the production of television reality shows.
[End of the excerpt of Allred's testimony]

*Due to the length of this post that example will be provided in a future blog entry.

Dear Anonymous

Dear anonymous, although I am not obligated to answer your "questions" I will provide some clarification. This may also provide background for newcomers who have noticed the baffling phenomenon of some commenters repeatedly coming here despite their obvious dislike of my blog. I am making this an entry of it's own so when this discussion has run its course we can move on with our own respective blogs, interests, views and lives.

I started this blog because I happened to post about living in the same town as the Gosselins on my other blog, and discovered people were interested in hearing more about it. I decided to call myself Werny Gal not to hide behind the name but because it was a good summation of what I was doing here. I signed my real name in comments and friends called me by my real name in comments. Eventually I learned there are fervant Kate fans who harass anyone they perceive as hating Kate. By the time I discovered this and removed old comments with my name in them, I had already been the target of harassment for some time without even knowing it. I usually stick to my own blog and mind my own business, but I am aware that there is ongoing discussion on a few Kate fanatiK blogs on topics such as how much I hate Kate, how I am abusing her children, and how I must be exposed because I am a hypocrite and therefore unqualified to work as a professional counselor. These discussions are infused with exagerations and outright lies about me, as they often are about other bloggers the Kate fanatiKs dislike or disaprove of and have similarly targetted. Along with the other bloggers whom the Kate fanatiKs dislike, I have been given an acronym, I have received threats such as "this time you've gone too far," I have been sent multiple nasty comments by the same few people using different names in attempts to make the fanatiKs look like a large contingency, personal information about me has been posted online, and I am the target of a flog. This negative energy is being expended by people who are anonymous and who would have much bigger and important battles to fight elsewhere if they didn't spend hours looking online for other bloggers to pick on, and by association they unfortunately reinforce the more negative aspects of Kate's reputation.

Since I started this blog I've become much more educated about the exploitation of children in the media. I've worked with many adults who were abused or exploited as children and also been involved in child advocacy for many years, but I never realized how the exploitation of children in entertainment was connected to child abuse. As a result in the past year I've gradually changed the focus of this blog. It started out as a silly lark but over time I've realized there are many caring people who are interested in learning about how the field of entertainment exploits children, and maybe even doing something about it. This entire experience has deepened my understanding of various levels of child abuse and my resolve to be part of the solution, as well as my appreciation for the many caring adults who want to help children.

In the beginning of my blogging here I made two short videos of interviews of fans standing in front of the Gosselin house, from my car window. (I've actually always found the phenomenon of the fans and paparazzi much more interesting than the Gosselins. I just never got what the big deal was.) I wanted to know what motivated some of them to drive hundreds of miles to stand there, and my readers enjoyed the videos. Less than a handful of other times I've taken a total of less than a dozen pictures out of my car window, usually of the papparazzi and most not published. One time when there was no danger to traffic I parked on the side of the road and spoke to a photographer at the fence for approximately two minutes and took four or five pictures of the same thing he was taking pictures of while Jon and the kids were posing. I do not regularly pass the Gosselin house and when I do pass it it's because my travels take me past it. I have never hung out at the Gosselin house. I have never hidden anything I've done and my family and friends know about this blog. I do regret taking pictures of the kids and after I did it I decided not do it again because it was unnecessary and yes, hypocritical. Despite that decision, what I did that one time may be distasteful to you or against your personal ethics, but it was not illegal. I respect the law, have testified for various judiciary committees on behalf of laws regarding children, am a loving mother and wife, and am a good citizen of my community.

I've always heard things about the Gosselins, most of which I've never told here because I felt it was too frivilous and sometimes too damaging or painful. I knew about several instances of Jon's bad behavior and heard the rumors about Kate and Steve way before they were in the media, and in one instance I tried through mutual connections to contact Jon to let him know that information about one of his indiscretions was going to come out in the media the next day so that he would have an opportunity to stop it, out of concern for what all the media craziness might be doing to the children. I never discussed any of these events until they were out in the mainstream media, and when I have discussed them it has always been out of concern for the children. When you read my snarkier entries, don't mistake my sense of humor for not caring. I have always fact-checked, the same way I do any time I hear a rumor about anyone, because I know how harmful gossip can be. If I've written anything here as being factual it is because I honestly believed it was, if not I've clearly stated so, and if it's my opnion I've stated that. When J&K+9 moved here there was lots of talk about them. Now there isn't so much talk anymore, and most folks wish they would just move away. However, people do still tell me things because of this blog. Most of it I don't bother to print here.

I have never sold advertising on my blog or in any other way made any money from anything related to the Gosselins. Al Walentis offered that I could read the first draft of his upcoming book and after reading it I offered him feedback on it as well as suggestions on some corrections I thought it needed which he could take or leave, but I am not in any way vested in Al's book. I excerpted three relatively benign passages on this blog because I thought they would be interesting to my readers, not to plug or promote the book. I plan to review it when it is released, and like most books I'll probably like some things about it and not like some others. I have a couple of friends whose books have been on the New York Times bestseller list and my friends can always count on me to be kind but honest.

I don't hate Kate or any of the Gosselins and I believe they both love their kids. I don't agree with some of Jon and Kate's parenting decisions, and I believe this entire experience has been damaging to them and the children, as well as other family members. IMO they made a mistake allowing TLC into their lives after the first special, and because they are still caught up in it they probably won't realize the repucussions of that professional alliance on their family for several years. We probably all agree that even without having become public figures their job as parents would've been very challenging, given their young ages at the time and the number of children they had. I don't know how anyone, especially the children, could go through what they have been through in the past year and a half and not be affected in long-term negative ways. It would have been traumatic even for adults with more maturity and more sophisticated coping skills than they have. It is surely overwhelming for the little ones.

My opinions and beliefs are my opinions and beliefs and in the long run they don't mean a hill of beans. That's why I'm Werny Gal instead of Anderson Cooper (hubba hubba.) I hope you enjoy this blog and find it educational and interesting. There's a word for people who continually subject themselves to suffering and that word is masochist. There are sites that do nothing but praise Kate, there are sites that IMO are unnecessarily nasty toward the Gosselins, and there are sites like mine that fit somewhere in the middle. In a country that allows freedom of expression and prohibits cyber harassment and cyberstalking, I suggest you find and stay at sites that most fit your needs and that you most enjoy.

Wishing you peace,
Werny Gal

My Money's On the End of Summer

According to my sharp-eyed blog commenter GeorgiaMom, one of the tabloids reported that Kate has had her assistant checking out schools in LA and for guest spots on sitcoms for the kids.

It's been looking like Kate has a hankering to move to L.A. ever since her DWTS experience. When (not if) that happens, Wernersville will breathe a sigh of relief and go back to being the quiet small town we locals have always known and loved. I think Kate would be a lot happier living in the Hollywood area and she'd have a much better chance of finding the kind of man she'd like to spend the rest of her life with. It saddens me that the Gosselin children might continue in entertainment because they've grown up with cameras and never had a chance to experience their childhoods with the privacy that most of us take for granted and without self-consciousness. The good news is if they move to California and continue to perform they will live in a state where their rights are better protected than they were here, thanks to better laws and child advocacy organizations such a A Minor Consideration. And in the long run the whole situation will have done some good here because we now will have improved child lablor laws and the authorities will be more likely to confirm they have been abided by. When this happens I will stop writing my blog because my perspective has been from living in the same small town as them. It's been fun but ending it would give me more time for other things. My bet is they'll be gone from Wernersville by the end of the summer, and Jon will follow them out there to be near the children.

Thansk GM, and if you send me the link to that report I'll add it here.

Gosselins To Take Parenting Class

Jon and Kate have to both take parenting classes which are mandatory for parents involved in custody disputes in Berks County, PA. The three hour class is called "Children In The Middle." Fortunately, Jon and Kate are allowed to take the class separately. Now wouldn't it be nice if they had to take a class called "Children In Reality TV?"

Happy Thanksgiving?

Here is the second installment on some of the material my friend, who worked for a tabloid for a few months last year, shared with me. As I said before, I am choosing to share some of the tamer material, out of respect for the kids. This entry covers events that took place during Thanksgiving 2009. I think it shows an interesting picture of daily life at Casa Gosselin, after the breakup and while Jon was living in the garage apartment. It also shows the mythical supermom Kate vs. the real Kate.
* * * * * * * * *

The day before the holiday a woman drove a black Volvo SUV through the gate and onto the Gosselin property. She made five trips, alone and in the rain, carrying a total of 16 white plastic bags of Giant groceries into the house.

A nanny source said,"wants to look like a supermom who does it all – taking care of eight kids and the house and having a career but the fact is that she barely does anything. She’s got so many people working for her and doing everything but nobody reports that. She’s had a woman here for two days working on preparing food for her and two people watching the kids and someone else cleaning the house. Kate spent most of the day locked in her office talking on the phone."

The only activity at Heffner RoadThanksgiving day was a visit by three Mennonite women who stopped by to leave a gift for Kate. One woman, from Kentucky, was visiting family in Lancaster County. She asked if Jon was here and the pap told her no. She said, "That’s OK, I didn’t want to see him anyway. I brought a gift for Kate."

That gift was three painted wood blocks. One word was embossed on each: Faith, Family, Friends. The Mennonite seemed put off by the fact Kate didn’t answer the buzzer or send Steve down to the gate to tote up her gift. After three attempts at leaving a message, she left the bag inside the gate and they left. Nobody came down for the bag by 8 p.m. Along with the painted blocks, the woman left a card that read, "A basket of wishes … and a bushel of love! Happy Thanksgiving from my family to yours."

A handwritten note said:
"Dear Kate –
I made this gift not knowing who to give it to. Then it came to me – you!
We all need these 3 in our life.
Friends – during times of trouble in one's life this is a test of who your real / true friends are.
Family – is next. Unfortunately, some have betrayed you. We can’t choose our family. We are born into one.
Faith – is at the top. Our friends will leave us, our family will disappoint us, but one thing for sure, God will never leave us or forsake us.
Kate, Happy Thanksgiving. May the Lord be with you. Take care & God Bless!"
[name removed by Werny Gal]

We arrived at the Gosselin house at sunrise Friday to confirm suspicions of Steve Neild and his wife sleeping over. Sure enough, they were still at the house. The lights were on in Jon’s apartment above the garage and you could see people milling about up in those quarters.

We texted Jon to let him know he had trespassers in his apartment, and he texted back, "Interesting." He phoned back a minute later, pissed. He said nobody’s supposed to go in there, ever, except him. "I have to have the locks changed now," he said, "I have a lot of valuable shit up there."

Jon said he was going to call Kate immediately and bitch her out for invading his private apartment. He said Kate had called him earlier and asked when he was stopping by to see the kids, but he now realized what she really called for was to make sure she had Steve out of the house before Jon got there. Otherwise, there could be a nasty encounter.
* * * * * * * * * * *
[end of report by Werny Gal's source]

Eight Legally Cleared for Filming Kate + Eight

This article from TMZ online, posted early this morning, claims the Gosselin kids have been cleared for working on Kate + Eight. Apparently Kate, who holds herself up as a model parent, still hasn't educated herself about the harms to children of being used in entertainment industry. And whatever happened to Jon's insistence that the kids not be filmed anymore? Was that a sincere desire to do what was best for his children, or was it just sour grapes because he bad-behaviored himself out of the entertainment industry?

The PA Dept of Labor & Industry still hasn't answered the question of whether all TLC employees, caterers, and all others involved in filming the series J&K+8 were cleared for child abuse and criminal backgrounds before being given access - sometimes alone in isolated places including bathrooms, bedrooms, or in the woods - to the Gosselin children.

The disaster continues to unfold.

It's Going To Be A Bumpy Ride

As my faithful readers know, a local friend who is a veteran news reporter was hired to gather fodder for a major tabloid/entertainment magazine/rag last summer, during the height of the hoopla, not to mention traffic snarls, on a certain country road in Wernersville, PA. I've always enjoyed listening to his tales of not only what he learned while he tailed Jon and Kate, but also about what it was like working for the tabloids. It's been a learning experience for me for sure, and I wasn't even the temporary paparazzi.

I haven't always written everything I know. In fact, I've often chosen not to share certain things because I didn't want to cause potential pain or instigate drama where it didn't already exist, at least in the public eye. I knew about several things way before they became public, but I kept them to myself until they came out, for the same reason, such as Kate and the bodyguard and some of Jon's wee johnnie roamings like with Stephanie, for example. We all have to remember that what we say is going into the vast permanent unknown that is The Internet, where eight little ones, swept up in this embarrassing and shameful saga with no choice of their own, will have access to it, maybe for forever. So I try to keep it real, minimally dramatic, and productive, when possible. (Okay, okay, so nobody's perfect, right?)

It turns out that my friend was keeping notes, a chronological journal, in fact, of his Summer of Gosselining. He shared it with me a couple of days ago, and what an addictive tome it is. I am impressed with his dedication to the subject and the breadth of his information gathered, and also frankly overwhelmed with details. With his permission, in my next couple of posts I'm going to share with you some of what I've learned.

So buckle that seat belt and stayed tuned. I will be posting later tonight.

Today's Hearing on PA Child Labor Laws

ADDED NOTE: Here's the link to watch the tape of the hearings online.


(original post)
15 Minutes has provided a good synopsis of Jodie Kreider's testimony at today's House Republican Policy Committee's hearings on Pennsylvania’s child labor laws as they relate to film and television production, which was streamed live today. I was only able to see Paul Petersen's testimony live and it was very informative as well as heartrending. I've received copies of his testimony as well as that of the Kreiders and the child psychologist R. Gullen and I'll be reviewing them this evening. Attorney Gloria Allred also testified but she did not provide a written copy of her testimony so I was unable to secure that. I've spoken with Representative Murt's office and there may be a way to access the hearings online for those of us who weren't able to watch the live feed. If that happens I'll let you know here. Meanwhile it's reassuring to know that some of our PA lawmakers are taking a look at this important issue.

Advocating For The Gosselin Eight

Anonymous (probably my most verbose commenter!) has provided a link about a hearing coming up Wed 4/14/10 in Horsham PA. The hearing is being held to consider the affect of reality TV shows like "Jon & Kate Plus 8" on child actors. Since PA has lax laws concerning the rights of child actors, this is wonderful news for all children in Pennsylvania who are involved in the entertainment industry as actors or participants in reality TV. Anything that draws attention to this issue is a step in the right direction.

Testifying will be the wonderful Paul Petersen of A Minor Consideration, fantastically ass-kicking attorney Gloria Allred, and Kevin and Jodi Krieder, the estranged brother and sister-in-law of Kate Gosselin who were once the Gosselin childrens' loving caregivers. The Gosselin eight and the children of PA could not have better advocates.

Too Much Information

No news lately. The locals don't seem to talk about J&K much anymore. Most folks seem to be glad the press has dried up. The less we hear, the more the townsfolk of Wernersville seem to like it. Jon has always been pleasant and gracious when approached but Kate has not ingratiated herself with the locals, and neither of them has really been active in the neighborhood. If they hung around The Cone or The Trolley Stop and people got to know them as familiar faces that would be great, but everyone's had it with the papparazzi.

The witty Al Walentis had this entry about Jon's ex Hailey the other day. I've never understood people who share intimate information about former lovers, but in this case I think Hailey Glassman is really discrediting herself. At one point she was suspected in the case of Jon's NYC apartment burglary, and then Jon himself was suspected of having staged the whole thing for more publicity. While observing the chronological tabloid reports about their affair it seemed to me that Hailey was becoming another one of those people that begins to believe their own press. As our tabloid culture has grown over the past twenty years, and especially in the past ten, people, especially young people, seem to not understand the differences between notoriety, infamy, and fame. They seem to think if you're in the press, you're famous, and that's always a good thing. Then, when they start to fade out of the public eye, they start to feel like failures, not realizing that all the press they were a part of never meant they were successful in the first place.

Did you ever hear the expression, "all press is good press"? Well, guess what? That's just wrong. Helping a kitten down from a tree or returning someone's money-filled wallet = good press. Telling the world you think your former sweetie's penis was inadequate while posing like a desparate porn star when your fifteen minutes were clearly up some time ago = bad press. All I can say about the whole Jon/Hailey sordid affair is "tacky, tacky, tacky" and so is continuing it by Hailey's airing her opinion about Jon's wingwang. This is the kind of crap the Wernersvillagers are so very sick of.

More "Reality" To Look Forward To

Confirmed.

So much for spending time with the kids, not drawing media attention to yourself, and staying close to home rather than traveling all over the country.

And on top of that, ewwww, the article refers to her as a "reality superstar." Talk about an oxymoron.

New Lives, New Loves?

A reader asked me if it's true Kate is dating a Reading Royal. I was unable to confirm this tidbit, but I have to admit it sounds somewhat far-fetched. I mean, hometown team rah rah rah and all that, but would Kate really settle for a Reading Royal? No matter how big the fish, Berks County seems to be way too small of a fishbowl for her taste. (What with the phony blonde hair extensions and all, could wrangling tickets to red carpet events with Hollywood B-listers be far behind?)

I also heard that Jon is staying in Utah with his new girlfriend Morgan Christie, 25, and her wealthy family, since he's been padlocked out of his NYC apartment. Also heard - disappointing news if it's true - Jon is negotiating with TLC to give them permission to tape the kids again, in exchange for having his monthly $10,000 child support payments reduced.

I am unclear on how Jon's child support payments would be related to any contract he negotiates with TLC. Why would the court lower his payments based on his working or not working out a new contract with TLC? The court is a legal entity and TLC is a commercial entity. So remember to take into consideration that this is just what I heard.

From my understanding Jon was locked out of his NYC apartment due to being unable to pay his rent. I still can't understand why Jon is paying child support payments instead of Kate. After all, she's the co-author or author of a couple of books, has had many more speaking engagements than he has over the years, and in general has made more money than Jon has all along. Good lord, at speaking engagements she charged $20 a piece for autographed photos. Is that highway robbery, or what? Plus she had the financial advantage in the past year of knowing more about their finances than Jon did, since handling the family finances has traditionally been her duty.

Speaking of Jon's apartment, reports are that he is accusing ex-girlfriend Hailey Glassman of being behind the ransacking. I always thought it sounded like someone who knew Jon and had a vendetta against him - an ordinary burglar wouldn't have left anything so personal as the butcher knife calling card. You know what they say - hell hath no fury like an ex-soulmate-Ed-Hardy-wearing-globe-trotting-girlfriend scorned.

Just when we thought the dust was settling...

Guess Who Made JibJab's 2009 Windup?

Jon and Kate - immortalized in 2009.

Kate on Leno Tonight

Kate will be on Jay Leno tonight at 10 PM, EST. Be there or be squa...er...home with your kids caring about them first, foremost and always, like you said you are.

Jon Gosselin Spotting

Reading area opthalmologist Adam Altman sent me this picture tonight. It was taken earlier this evening when he ran into Jon Gosselin at Third & Spruce Cafe' in West Reading. Adam said Jon was sincere, gracious and friendly when asked to take the picture.

Adam is married to my friend Robin, who writes a hilarious blog. Read back through some of her entries and you are sure to at least giggle, if not fall on the floor painfully clutching your ribs. And if you like her humor be sure to buy her book, Shrink Rap: An Irreverent Take on Child Psychiatry. Robin is a child shrink, parent and standup comic, all of which qualify her to write a very funny (and really quite helpful) book on parenting.

Hmm...book on parenting. Wonder if a certain neighbor who lives on the other side of Penn Avenue, and who will be hitting the road with her very own talk show which will require her to spend lots of time away from her children in the spring, and to whom parenting comes first, foremost, and always, might like a copy?

Ding Dong, the Show is Dead!

Ding dong, the show is dead.

This will give both Jon and Kate an opportunity to pursue whatever vocations they'd like to without involving the kids. Maybe Kate will get her own TV talk show. Who knows about Jon? Maybe he'll retreat into obscurity, where he's often wished he could escape back into. Or maybe he'll pursue some form of entertainment employment of his own (hopefully without collaborating with people like Michael Lohan ~ doesn't the fact that he is not a success and that his own very troubled daughter calls him a "scumbag" give you a clue?) Whatever. Now the kids have an opportunity for some privacy ~ and time and space for healing ~ during the rest of their childhoods.

The kids have never been old or mature enough to be capable of the level of informed consent their parents were. Later, in their adulthoods, if they want to go back into the entertainment business or even capitalize on the fame they once had as children, more power to them. But for now, let the kids be kids.

Good job Jon Gosselin!

My Bad

Like I said a couple of posts ago, sometimes I just can't help myself.

The next post will be more thoughtful. I promise.

Cutting Jon Slack, No Slack For Kate

Those who have been reading this blog for some time may wonder why I seem to cut Jon more slack than I do Kate. Why do I defend him and not her? The reason is my years of work as a therapist with victims of PTSD caused by childhood abuse, domestic violence and other emotional trauma has led me to view Jon as a victim of emotional abuse.

I believe that Jon is a victim of domestic violence and that the violence started way before even the twins were born. Everyone I've talked to - and it's been several people - who worked with Kate at the hospital years before the kids came along have spoken about how high maintenence, demanding, and controlling she was. She's always been the same old Kate we've seen on the show, only more so, at least before she recently started putting some spin control on it and started acting (as opposed to being "reality") nice (or pitiable) when the cameras are on. And she's still the same old Kate when the camera's aren't on - demanding, narcisistic, and just plain mean. In short, abusive of whoever she wants to be abusive to, unless she wants something from them or she thinks they can further her "career."

It looks to me like Jon never stood a chance. When they met he was younger than Kate, naive, and malleable. The first time Kate saw him at a picnic and decided she wanted him, he was a goner, and she has proudly stated that it didn't even matter to her that he already had a girlfriend at the time. One doesn't have to look far to see her abuse of Jon because years of it are permanently recorded on the show, in episode after episode - putdowns, nasty jokes at his expense, slapping him. If she thought it was okay to treat him that way on camera, in full view of the world, imagine how she treated him in private, without anyone watching. Reports from locals who have been in their Wernersville home say that she screams, throws things and is nasty, mean and cruel, and I believe it. One person told me that a friend who was employed (I won't say what for but I will say it involved household work, not child care) by the Gosselins refused to work there when Kate was home because Kate was so abusive and horrible, but she loved working at the home when Jon was there because he was pleasant and kind. Kate behaves this way in front of the children, either unaware that she is role-modeling unhealthy adult relationship patterns in front of them, or not caring.

Imagine years of emotional abuse in the form of putdowns about everything that makes you you - your appearance, your humor, your thoughts and your feelings. Then imagine your partner being rewarded for abusing you, in the form of national attention and big paychecks. Attempts to assert yourself verbally are ignored or bulldozed over until you know it's no use even trying. Everyone sees her treating you that way and no one speaks up about it or acts as though it is unusual or unwarranted. In short, it is accepted as normal and if you don't like it, there's something wrong with you.

This is the world of the emotionally controlled and abused, and I believe this is the world of Jon Gosselin for all the years he was under the control of Kate. He said, after the public became aware that the relationship had been a sham for some time, that maybe he'd been too passive, and now it was time for him to assert himself. Well, Hell Yes, but by the time he did, it was too little and too late.

Underneath all the tabloid drama, I believe that Jon is basically a good person who waited too long to take control of his own life and has made some unfortunate social choices, but underneath it all, loves his children and has not intentionally hurt anyone. Unfortunately, even though I'm one who tries to be fair and give everyone the benefit of the doubt, I cannot say the same for Kate.

I realize I may be in the minority in the above beliefs, but this is my opinion. Your comments are welcome.

Another Letter To Jon Gosselin From A Neighbor

Dear Jon,

Great quote from you to E.T. online news on the Internet today:

"What she does on TV, that's her career. I'm happy for her career," the father of eight told "ET." "I hope she can be happy for my career [and] we can have a career on TV, kind of together, but our kids will come off."

C'mon Jon, make it true!

Hugs,
Your neighbor,
Polly